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JELLO PUDDING IS FOR SHIT EATERS.

Actually I think I just hate Jello in general. For starters, Jello commercials are only rivaled by the shitty 'Sunny D' ads for pure annoying factor. As long as I can remember, JELLO Ads have been annoying me. I remember when that flappy-lipped turd Bill Crosby was hawking them surrounded by shitty little children with shit-eating facial expressions eating this gelatinous multicolored swill. It has hardly improved since then. The latest batch of JELLO commercials make me want to puke. They feature a bunch of middle aged cock jockeys 'wiggling' while an annoying voice in the background sings about what else but "Wiggling?" The first one featured just semi-attractive women (with flapjack tits and beavers that resemble dead rats just the same I imagine.... they still had that stretched-out-pumped-out-a-bunch-of-kids-and-ruined-some-dude's-life-and-got-fat-so-now-they-want-to-watch-their-weight-to-be-more-attractive-to-their-unfortunate-husbands-even-though-they-still-won't-fuck-em-look to them) but the latest has thrown goofy looking guys into the mix, in a depressing office environment. Perhaps eating shitty snacks and wiggling like jackasses is the only break from the monotony of their miserable lives. I hope they all get congenital herpes and rape each other's  mouths.

Alas if it were only the annoying commercials, I might be able to tolerate it. However just like the aforementioned Sunny Delight atrocities, JELLO is shit. Every time I see some disgusting kid with brown smears around his mouth, I want to punt the little dunghill rat into traffic. Note to parents. Don't feed your kids processed garbage that makes them look like they've been eating shit. It makes you a bad parent. I hate everything about JELLO pudding. IT'S NOT EVEN REAL PUDDING. It's the Cheez Whiz of pudding. (CHEEZ WHIZ blows too. FUCK YOU KRAFT CANADA!)

The Gelatin snacks aren't much better. I can barely swallow that shit, its what I imagine it would be like to have someone spit congealed cum into my mouth. They've tested it and apparently JELLO has an IQ of 3. That's still 4 points more than the stupid asshole who invented gelatin in plastic cups.

In closing, I hate JELLO PUDDING and JELLO Gelatine alike, and if you like this shit, it makes you less of a human being.

FUCK JELLO.